Developing a Healthy Self-Esteem in Your Child
Developing a Healthy
Self Esteem in Your Child
Children with healthy self-esteems try hard in school, get
along well with others, hold a "can-do" attitude about life,
and feel positive about their environment. They can accept
ups and downs graciously. The opposite is true of children
who suffer from low self-esteems. These children compare
themselves to others and never feel they have done well
enough. They are frustrated easily and fear risk and
challenge. Children with low self-esteems can easily fall
prey to peer pressure, eating disorders, and other dangers.
You can help a child who has a low self-esteem by examining
the reasons behind it. You can also encourage the continuity
of those children who have healthy self-esteems. By using a
positive, can-do attitude in your home, you will pass that
attitude on to your child. Try the following ideas to
encourage a positive self-esteem:
EXAMINE YOURSELF AND YOUR ATTITUDE
Children learn by example. If you hold a high self-esteem
and think positively, odds are your child will to. If you
suffer from a low self-esteem you will need to examine your
current patterns of thinking and work on changing them.
SEEK OUT THE POSITIVE
This does not mean you need to be a Pollyanna but you should
search for the positive side of things. When your child
comes to you with a problem, ask questions and pursue the
positive side. The same goes for how you act in your own
endeavors. When things go wrong look for the up side.
RELATE TO YOUR CHILD
Parent's often will sit and tell the humorous stories of
their past. There is probably much more your child would
like to hear. When your child comes to you with a dilemma,
share your own experience. Even though you may be years
apart your child may find relief that you have had times of
self-doubt and concern.
WHY ASK WHY?
If your child uses statements like "I can't" or other
statements that show he is frustrated or giving up, ask "Why
can't you?" Asking these questions may frustrate your child
and you may hear answers like "I don't know... I just
can't!" Try bringing the subject up later when the intensity
of the situation has lessened. Then ask "Earlier today you
said you could not solve that puzzle, why don't you think
you could solve it?" By exploring reasons together you may
find the source of a low self-esteem.
IDENTIFY STRENGTHS
Another way to increase self-esteem is to emphasize a
child's strong points. If he is good in art but doesn't do
well in sports--work with him and praise him on his art. By
developing a feeling of confidence in one area, that
confidence may spread into another area of a child's life.
PRAISE AND ENCOURAGEMENT
Praise and encouragement are essential vitamins for a child.
Encourage all children and praise them for situations where
they put their "all" into it, no matter what the result.
Filling your vocabulary with positive statements and
providing a positive environment are big steps in helping
your child build a healthy self-esteem.
About the Author
Brook Noel is an international best-selling author and has
written over 10 books. Her newest book The Change Your Life
Challenge: A 70 Day Life Makeover Program for Women has
helped thousands of women improve relationships, finances,
home management, self-esteem, fitness, self-care, stress and
depression you can visit the website at
http://www.changeyourlifechallenge.com/.
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